When Catch Up Coffees & Kids Don’t Mix

You know when you have a great friend when there’s no need to explain or apologise when plans… well… just don’t go to plan. Every now and again there comes a time when I meet up with my very best friend for a catch up but the little ones just aren’t feeling it. This week was one of those.

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Me and Jodie go back longer than anybody else I know, not including family of course. We went to secondary school together and once we got to know each other that was it. We understand one another. We have seen the best and the worst of one another and our friendship has stood firm through it all. Jodie is an incredible photographer, videographer and the successful creator of the Dear Little Daisy blog. She is my go to girl for so many things. In the 14 years we have known each other, we have only ever had one row. A big stupid one where we didn’t speak for quite a while but the only one. Lesson learned. NEVER let a man get inbetween our friendship!

We usually meet once a week while Riley and Sonny are at school. Zachary and Daisy are all but a few months apart in age. I recall Riley and his cousin of the same age, at 2 or 3 to be quite a rocky time in their relationship. I remember them fighting more than they did get along. Now they are older they get along great! This is precisely how Zachary and Daisy felt about each other this week.

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We met at our usual spot and headed off to Muffin Break. I got my carer passport through the post so thought 10% off a hot chocolate was just what we needed to get us through the bitterly cold and wet day. The little ones were in a particularly ratty frame of mind. We both knew it without having to say. It all started between them with an argument over who’s mummy is who’s mummy. Jodie played referee while I did my thing at the bank.

“My mummy!” … “No my mummy!” … “My mummy!” … “No my mummy!”

We settled them down in their chairs and decided to order our food and drinks one at a time. Reluctantly but rather desperately, the Ipad came out as a distraction. Good ole Peppa Pig we thought! We knew without it this was a recipe for disaster. Even so, Zachary wouldn’t sit on his chair, he took Daisy’s ‘Bing and Sula’ toys, which he devilishly dunked into his drink. Daisy played with Zacharys toy cars until he decided he wanted to swap. Zachary wanted to chat with Daisy and touched her arm. Daisy didn’t want to spoken to or touched and shrieked in disgust. They weren’t feeling being in each others company.

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Both extremely bright and headstrong little people. They bickered and squealed while we parents tried in vain to hush them. Bribery with chocolate biscuits, marshmallows from our drinks would not work. Looks from fellow coffee drinkers around us only added to the pressure. I’m certain Zachary knew this and upped his game. He knew I was trying to keep him hush and he wasn’t having any of it. A loud security alarm started to sound which distracted the children long enough for me and Jodie to enjoy a little of our drinks. Nobody seemed alarmed by the noise, nobody was running. So we didn’t move an inch. We were adamant nothing else would stand between us and our brunch!

Our coffee and catch up resulted in us briefly sitting beside one other whilst playing referee to two squabbling toddlers. Gulped down our drinks in strong determination to savour a little of the things we had brought.  We up and left in a hurry leaving a table of half eaten food. We accepted in the end that it just wasn’t happening. A quick trip to the toy shop for play dough and a long walk round town thinking they may just fall asleep and perhaps me and Jodie could try that again. No such luck, we parted ways with a sigh and a smile. Same time next week we say to one another.

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What I love the most is that this has no impact on our friendship. We don’t need to apologise, there’s no need to explain. If it’s not going to happen then it won’t, no matter what you try. Sometimes it just doesn’t work out the way we want it to.

That’s the beauty of toddlers I guess.

Unpredictable little bundles of fun!

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About the Author

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Mum of three young boys. Sharing our family journey to an Autism and ADHD diagnosis.

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